Weekend Wrapup: Cake and Popular Girl Syndrome

My non-view of Cake...not so sweet...

My non-view of Cake...not so sweet...

For those of you who went to Artscape late Saturday afternoon hoping to catch a glimpse of the band Cake, as they performed at 6:30….I hope you got there a whole lot earlier than I did. By the time we found a parking space (got a $27 ticket…thanks Baltimore City), and wiggled through the crowd…the amphitheatre was totally packed…seriously, not a place to sit, or even stand where you could see them. So, we heard a few songs(though no Short Skirt, Long Jacket)…briefly considered a looooooong line for food, and peaced out for home and leftovers and Beyond Rangoon on Netflix. The leftovers were good, the movie …not so much.

Owl cake made from split oreo cookies, icing, and m&ms....

Owl cake made from split oreo cookies, icing, and m&m's....

Sunday afternoon  my daughter and I went to a gathering of …wow, I’m not sure how to put this…ex-sorority girls? No that’s not right, because once a sister always a sister…so, umm…mature sorority girls maybe? Oh, I don’t know, but we all used to belong to the same college sorority from schools all over the nation, and now live in Baltimore and occasionally have a little meet and greet. It’s usually people you don’t know at all…which is a little nerve wracking for almost anyone. Add to that you don’t know what the ages of the group will be for the most part….it can be girls who are just out of college and recently moved to town….to those in their 30s and 40 with a couple of kids… to women who have retired. Let me say that yesterday, I was the oldest sorority girl there…and I would not have attended this gathering( I suspected it was a pretty young group) except that I was my daughter’s security blanket.  It was a potluck…and she made this really cute owl cake that she saw online…me…pulled pork barbecue.

But the whole gathering made me think about how it almost felt like rush…going into a room full of girls you do not know…who are all there, to judge you and your worthiness. Not fun. So there is an element of this still present when you go to a party where you don’t know people. Will they like me? What should I wear? Am I overdressed? Underdressed? OMG!!! It takes you right back to the days when you wanted to be the popular girl. And indeed, there is still that wannabe in most of us. Even at my Mom’s retirement home, there are cliques and the cool people…”Oh, she has lots of money and she doesn’t mind you knowing it!”, she will say about a seemingly nice lady who is dripping with jewelry. So my Mom would never dream of sitting with her…she’s a popular  girl. I was talking about this very thing with a “sister” who is a math professor at a local college….(math whiz?)…about how insecure going to a gathering where you don’t know anyone can make you? She commented, “It’s interesting that with you being on tv and doing what you do, you still think about what to wear…”, but I’m no different than her.  I believe that people are all the same on the inside….even those you see as self-possessed and confident… they still worry just as much as anyone else about who likes them. Maybe more. Anyway, it ended up being  a fun couple of hours…nice young women, a couple of husbands, two kids and one dog. And how was your weekend?

3 Responses

  1. I so wanted to see CAKE! My wife and I think they are so fun, even our 5 7/8 yr old daughter likes to get down with “mahna mahna”. But I had to work saturday and sunday with a big wedding show. This weekend however I will be competing in the Upper Chesapeake crab soup challenge in Havre de Grace. i’ll look for the manatee!

  2. Donna,
    Your story about your sorority alum gathering really struck home! I have the exact same feelings and have actually backed out of going at the last minute more than once because I felt I didn’t have anything appropriate to wear that would make me look decent. I did manage to talk myself into going to one once and was also the oldest one there by 10 years! Talk about feeling out of place. Rush was easier than this gathering!!!
    Enjoy your blog greatly and have been a fan of your since you were doing Inside Magazine! ( I think that was the name of the show)

  3. Donna,
    I did comment on the Owl cake but for some reason it must not have posted….

    LOVE the Owl cake!! and bet it was delicious!! Your daughter is very much …The Julia Child / Martha Stewart!!

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