Hallelujah, my son is engaged….finally!!!

At the risk of being one of those bloggers that I read about in the Baltimore Sun this week in an article by Andrew Ratner about the “blogosphere”, in which he says a certain percentage of bloggers report their personal relationships have suffered with friends and family because of their blogs(because they use them for blog-fodder…),  but I still just have to tell you this! My son and the lovely Jennifer, about whom I’ve written often (too often?) are…yes…engaged. At long last. Like many parents of 20-somethings, you watch their lives from a certain distance(judging, judging, always judging, my daughter would say)…but that’s not true. More like, observing.

And here’s what I have observed. My son has been in a wonderful relationship, with a wonderful girl, for a wonderfully long time. And in his Mother’s opinion, which was never asked by the way, it was time for a ring. No, I never said anything, never even hinted at it…I don’t think. The only time I ever brought it up was a couple of years ago, when he was home sans Jen, I asked very casually, I swear, “So, do you and Jen ever think about getting married ?” He clearly interpreted my casual question(I practiced it, serously), as inquiring into his private life(which I was), where he did not want to go(and we didn’t).

Yeah, enought of that subject. So I just let it go, and thought, what is meant to be, is meant to be. Good Mommy, yes? Yet as the months and years went on of this happy relationship, my family in ‘bama has nagged…yes, nagged me relentlessly about it. “When are they getting engaged?”….”I’d like to go to a wedding while I’m still young enough to dance.” “Do you think it will be this year?”  Leave me alone, leave me alone…..was what I wanted to scream, but just smiled wanly and said, “I really don’t know.”

So, last Friday night, when we got a call from the boy and he announced, “I just asked Jen to marry me…”, there was great happiness all around. Happiness for him, for her(oooh my future daughter-in-law I can say that now!!), for her family, for our family, which will soon be one family. And I can’t wait. And no, I don’t think there will be any big wedding…Jennifer just isn’t into that it seems, and really, with the economy being what it is, it might be too much anyway. A small wedding is such a kindness to the bride and groom’s respective families, don’t you think?

Anyway, I wanted to share the news with you….for those of you who have gone before me, keep me in your thoughts….that I don’t say or do the wrong thing (beyond writing about it), that everything stays on a somewhat even keel, that none of us go off the deep end….wow, any cliches I missed there? But you know what I mean. I just want it to be a happy time. Not a stressful time. None of us need any more of that right now. We need some good news…and I got some!


9 Responses

  1. Congrats…Something must have been in the air on Friday, one of good friends just proposed to his longtime girlfriend….

  2. Donna, Congratulations. I know from your past blogs you are very fond of Jen. This means so much. We have a wonderful daughter-in-law. Best Wishes to the happy couple. Speaking of great news, on Friday our daughter adopted her foster son which she has had for 2 years and 2 months. He was seven months old when she got him. Our family is just thrilled. Thank you for your wonderful blogs. I enjoy them very much. Loretta

  3. Oh that is wonderful Loretta….a new member of the family, and sounds like the baby boy is a fortunate son. And Amy…surely your good friend isn’t my son….is the world that small???????

  4. I know exactly how you feel. I was not sure that my son (who has two older sisters who are happily married) would ever find the right girl. Finally at 28, he started dating a delightful young lady and proposed a few months later. The entire family is delighted. Suggestion for staying on good terms with your son and future daughter-in-law, don’t ask about grandchildren.

  5. Congratulations and best wishes to everyone!!

  6. YAY! I just got engaged too! Well, 3 months ago tomorrow, but I swear it feels like yesterday. This is such a wonderful time for you too! Both of our parents never nagged us about getting engaged….THANK GOD…I know some people who weren’t so lucky. Did you know that he was proposing on Friday? Had he told anyone how he was going to do it? Ian had already told my parents, so that Friday evening they sat anxiously by the phone waiting for the “offical” call 🙂

  7. Katrina, congratulations!!!! And no , I had NO prior knowledge about the question being popped, though he did call her parents, who were sitting in a restaurant having dinner with friends, to ask their permission. So old school.It seems to have been somewhat impetuous. And Carol, I will take your good advice and not be asking about kids….

  8. I was just watching WBAL news (of course), your blog news was just mentioned. Congrats, Donna, on the engagement of your son!!

  9. Congratulations Donna!

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